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I’m That Mom — Say Yes
…a blog carnival started by Ronnie Maier, inspired by this post.
More and more, the kids all show up at my boat. My kids ask if they can go play on the other boat, and are told that no, they have to be quiet, or no, someone’s busy, or no, someone cleaned, or or or… every excuse to avoid the noise and chaos of children in a small space.
One by one, they end up over here. We’re the boat with the legos. The one where there’s food and you can even have some, between meals. We’re the boat with the computer playing Dora and Scooby-Doo and Batman and no one even is annoyed that they’re not “educational”. We’re the boat with the DS games. We’re the boat where the answer is yes.
Saying “yes” is the #1 hardest and most rewarding zen exercise in parenting. We’re trained to think that we must restrict, we must confine, we must control. Always, we must control.
Nonsense. Say yes. Yes yes yes yes. It becomes easier with practice. Chocolate almond milk with breakfast? Yes. Drop everything and watch clouds? Yes. Make a fort with the newly-washed laundry? Yes. Yes yes yes. Try it.
Yes.
The world will not end. Your chores will either get done, or they will wait for you. As Missy said, in one of the most brilliant blog posts ever,
I know that, one day, this time will be over and it’s that knowledge that is forcing me to take a new look at time, to take advantage of what we have instead of postponing life until everything is perfect. I should know by now that “perfect” is not a reasonable goal, that if I put a project off until my house is clean, we’ll never get to the project; if I put off swimming with my kids until my stomach is flat again, I’ll never be able to teach them how to jump waves. And I know that, in the end, my hesitation is going to be remembered a lot more clearly than how I look in my bathing suit.
Say yes. Try it. Just a small one, right now. Then let it get bigger.
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Putting aside fear and control and saying yes — you express it beautifully.
Yes! A beautiful contribution.
Yes Yes Yes!!!
Yes! Wonderful!
“Say yes. Try it. Just a small one, right now. Then let it get bigger.”
best advice of the evening – love it
YES
Preach it, sistah! “Yes” is a powerful thing. And it’s nice to have a BIG boat!
Saying ‘yes’ is the hardest thing for some (most?) parents to learn. Lovely post.
Oh. My mom told me to never say no unless there was a REASON. If you can possibly say yes, do it.
She’s also the one who said to never, ever say anything negative if you could possibly say something good instead.
Why would anyone ever choose to comment on something negative if they could possibly find a good thing to say.
(Everyone blossoms when she’s got their back.)
That poem, God Says Yes to Me is one of my favorites.
So are you, btw, L. love you, V
[...] Elemental Mom (who apparently lives on a boat) [...]
Oh I just absolutely love your post! It is hard to find parents with the same parenting philosophy as us. So refreshing! Thank you for the reminder to say yes!!!
Oh totally! Though in our case it is a tumble down sort of house and it is freshly washed blankets making a great place to jump and hide.
Awesome we always try to say “Yes”.
Wonderful post dude! I’ve missed it over here. I love how you’ve redecorated, crazy comfortable.
I’ve missed seeing you around, Laureen. Love this blogpost sooo much. And you too.